Relief.

The interview was this morning, and to be honest, I'm trying to figure out what I should say about it. There weren't any warning signs that said "Run away! You shouldn't take this soulless, awful job!" but I didn't have an epiphany, or come to a realization that this is the perfect job for me. If anything, I'm even more uncertain about it; there are some really cool aspects (Working with books for a living! Doing something I like in a field that is interesting! Working for a prestigious organization for what appears to be a decent salary!), but there are also parts of the job that I don't really care for and/or am not very good at (networking, communicating well with others, having to live an ocean away). I kind of wish I had the opportunity to try it out for a few weeks and see how it goes, and then make my decision. I suppose that's the entire point of the "probationary period", but it's tough to leave straight away after that without feeling like a failure. Anyway, I guess that's not my decision to make at this point; the woman with whom I interviewed said that she'd let me know her decision next week.

Here's the weird thing, though: I think the interview went well. (!) All right, not abnormal for most people, but I get really nervous under pressure and freeze up, sounding like I don't know what I'm talking about. This time, they asked me concrete questions I could answer (for the most part), I think my answers went over fairly well, and my experience seems to fit with the job. It's actually rather odd how well this job and I (on paper, at least) match up. But the really strange part is that I wasn't too nervous; I was just thinking, 'Well, I guess I'll just chat with these people and if they like me, great! If not, oh well.' Does this mean I've become (*gasp*)more confident? Does it mean I'm a grown-up? Strange things happen.

That being said, though, I came home after it was over, ate lunch, and totally fell asleep for two hours. Guess it was more stressful than I realized.

Something's not right...

I've been enjoying my Day O' Freedom very much, and by that I mean doing as little as possible. Though I did get around to doing the dishes, cleaning the bathroom (gross), participating in an online 'professional development' course and getting the week's lesson plans done. But somehow I've gotten this strange feeling of unease in the past 20 minutes or so. I don't know if it's because of an email from DB (he feels it's unlikely that I'll get a great deal of financial aid) or just dreading going back to work tomorrow, but my good mood has vanished. Weird.